A statue of a U.S. Marine stands in the rain in Bethesda, Maryland. Photo by Dominic Gwinn
Good morning, this is The Smoke Eater for Thursday, April 2, 2020 and I know you'll be my side.
Quick Hit
* A sailor's life * Floating hospitals and truck stops * Some Russian B.S. * A bit fact checking * “One of these days, I’m gonna punch you in the face!” *
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Sailing Up Shit Creek
The military is not shutting down to fight the novel coronavirus. This rumor started floating around after the captain of the U.S.S. Theodore Roosevelt, Captain Brett Crozier, sent a four-page letter warning about an outbreak of the novel coronavirus aboard the aircraft carrier. On March 24, Capt. Crozier reported three crew members had been infected, but that number ballooned to around 100 a week a later. The San Francisco Chronicle cites an unnamed senior officer aboard the ship saying between 150 and 200 sailors had already tested positive.
On Monday, acting Navy Secretary Thomas Modly responded to Crozier's letter during an interview on CNN saying the Navy had been aware of the situation "for about 24 hours," and was working on a solution to get sailors off the ship, but it had problems finding space to quarantine the sailors in Guam, where the ship is currently docked. Modly stressed that the Roosevelt was, "not the same as a cruise ship. I mean that ship has armaments on it, it has aircraft on it. We have to be able to fight fires if there are fires onboard the ship. We have to run a nuclear power plant."
Several hours later, Defense Secretary Mark Esper went on the CBS Evening News and told host Norah O'Donnel that he had not read Crozier's letter "in detail." Joseph Trevithick writes in The War Zone, "The general consensus is that Crozier felt he had to write the letter at all in order best safeguard his crew, even at the cost of his career in the Navy. It's also impossible to know how the service might have responded if it did not become public. There is certainly some evidence that senior Navy and other top U.S. military officials had not been taking the situation as seriously as they should have." [Capt. Crozier's Letter]
During a Pentagon briefing, Navy officials told reporters that 1,273 sailors had been tested -- 86 of whom are exhibiting symptoms. Additionally, the Navy did not rule out punishing Capt. Crozier for breaking the chain of command and going public.
As has been noted by other military nerds, Capt. Crozier outlined two potential strategies for dealing with the virus (image via San Francisco Chronicle)...
Today the Navy announced it had reached a deal with with the government of Guam to evacuate 2,700 of the ships roughly 5,000 sailors within the next few days. Navy officials tell CNN that it's simply not possible to evacuate the entire crew component due to essential duties aboard the ship that include maintaining the Nimitz-class supercarrier's two nuclear reactors. One anonymous sailor who had been evacuated after testing positive told CNN over the weekend, "More will get infected based on the current conditions -- not a matter of if, but when."
Floating Hospitals and Truck Stops
Earlier this week people hailed the arrival of U.S.N.S. Comfort as it sailed into New York. The Navy hospital ship is helping relief efforts for city's non-infected patients. It's sister ship, the Mercy, is currently docked in Los Angeles on a similar mission. Defense News' David Larter reports that the two converted super-tankers are frequently used for disaster relief despite being designed for combat causalities. But after 35 years of service, they're showing their age -- like much of the Navy's support vessels. In December, the Navy released a non-classified report that found its sealift fleet (imagine a floating fleet of 18-wheelers) was in desperate need of an update. Larter noted on social media that the military has been utilizing the Comfort and Mercy for relief missions regularly, and that these types of support ships often serve as poignant and memorable symbols soft power during peace time, and of Uncle Sam actually "doing something."
Buzzfeed has a good photo essay on the recovery operations aboard the Mercy and the Comfort right now from various wire services. It's worth a look.
"Military Intelligence"
Reuters reports that NATO countries are unlikely to meet spending goals the White House has complained about in light of the coronavirus. NATO has been key in the transfer of medical supplies throughout the Eurozone during the crisis. Foreign policy nerds note that defense spending is often the first thing on the economic chopping block during times of crisis.
The administration has deployed 540 U.S. troops to the southern border, Tara Copp reports for McCaltchy. According to DHS, the deployment is intended to "seal off" the border. Lt. Gen. Laura Richardson, commander of U.S. Army North says, "We're going to protect our nation from COVID-positive migrants."
Extremist groups aren't letting the corona-crisis go to waste. The AP reports that anti-terrorist coalition forces in Africa and the Middle East have been pulling back operations in the wake of the pandemic, potentially leaving an opening for suicidal assholes in desperate need of a new hobby. Some fundamentalist leaders have advised their followers to use the time to study their respective religious texts, and prepare larger conflicts.
Critics of Russian President Vladimir Putin are pissed he sent the U.S. personal protective equipment and ventilators. Reuters reports state media is advising doctors to sow their own masks, and a trade union for medical workers has been soliciting donations so doctors could buy PPE. Foreign policy nerds continue to raise serious questions about any country accepting any aid from Russia, and yesterday the U.S. State Department posted a notice saying the U.S. had bought the PPE from Russia. Infection and casualty rates from COVID-19 remain curiously low throughout Russia, and this morning Putin extended a "non-working period" in Moscow through April 30.
Fact Check
Russian state media is still peddling the conspiracy that the coronavirus is a U.S.-funded biological weapon, Polygraph reports. The crux the myth centers around a lab in Tiblisi, Georgia designed to, "detect biological threats as they emerge," and "research into medical countermeasures to mitigate the dangers they pose and vaccines to prevent their spread." Polygraph notes that in 2017 the lab offered an open invitation to "all areas of the site" so people could poke around and ask questions following a similar Russian disinfo campaign. In 2018, an ex-KGB politico spouted off similar nonsense about the lab's research into hepatitis.
Barak Ravid gossips for Axios that Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu showed a bunch of cabinet ministers what he thought was video of Iran dumping bodies of COVID-19 victims in a dumpster, but it was actually clip from the 2007 Hallmark Channel mini-series, "Pandemic."
NPR reports the administration will not reopen the healthcare marketplace to allow millions of unemployed people to apply for Medicaid. Vice President Mike Pence dodged a question about reopening the healthcare marketplace from Fox News' John Roberts during yesterday's press briefing. Trump followed up Pence by gloating, "I think it's one of the greatest answers I've ever heard. Because Mike was able to speak for five minutes and not even touch your question. That's what you call a great professional." He then complained that Democrats haven't been talking about healthcare for the entirety of the 2020 election cycle.
The president does not have the legal authority to issue a national quarantine. The majority of that power rests with state governors, or Congress. As has been the case throughout the majority of the current administration, there isn't much of legal precedent for the rampant disregard of unwritten rules and political norms, the legal nerds are at odds about how one could go into effect.
In order to boost the economy, the White House has proposed rolling back a provision established during the GOP's 2017 corporate tax cut bill that would once again allow corporations to deduct what they spend on entertainment and meals. Trump shitposted that restaurants "will all be saved," seemingly unaware that most retail, entertainment, and bars and restaurants are operating under very limited capacity, or are shutdown. NPR clarifies that businesses can, in fact, still deduct meals on their taxes.
Cabbage is safe to eat, the AFP reports. A rumor on social media rumor has been floating around that the coronavirus can linger in cabbage heads for up to 30 hours, and that the The World Health Organization has cautioned people to stay away from cabbage. Health officials say you should always be washing your fruits and vegetables, just like you wash your hands: thoroughly, and all the time.
One More Thing...
Does anyone else remember the 2001 sitcom, "That's My Bush?" From Trey Parker and Matt Stone, co-creators of “South Park” and “The Book of Mormon,” the show was set during the early days of the bumbling George W. Bush administration. The show mocked T.V. clichés, such as a nod to The Honeymooners that featured Bush turning to his wife, Laura, and saying, "One of these days, Laura, I'm gonna punch you in the face." The series was abruptly canceled after 9/11. All eight episode are available for streaming under a Creative Commons License at the Internet Archive.
OK, here's a cute critter video: BABY GORILLA!
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